The Goodbye

My Gma Bush passed away yesterday morning.

I feel relief- because she is out of pain now and her body is now perfect in the arms of Jesus.

I feel sorrow- because losing someone you love will do that to you.

I feel numb- because… I don’t know why. I spent so much time crying last week I seem to be out of tears. I’m sure that will change. But for now, I’m holding my own.

I feel tired- I couldn’t sleep enough.

I feel hungry- I’m finding out just how much of an emotional eater I am. This is going to set me back a month at least. Gma would smack me upside the head if she was still here. Lucky for my head, she isn’t.

Most of all, I feel loss. The hurting kind. But Gma would be happy that she is missed so much already. She was a drama queen just like me. She loved people falling all over her. So a good amount of grief seems fitting.

I will be taking this week off from blogging. We have a lot of things to do- the girls are going to be in their first play this week. Every day during school. They will have to miss Thursday for the funeral, but other than that, they have 7 performances to get through this week. And Tim is struggling with the idea of death. Matt and I are going to do our best to support the kids through this confusing time. And Matt has a hot mess on his hands with me. Pray for him to have strength and wisdom of how to deal with his wife.

Thank you all for your prayers and encouragement through this difficult time.

Every word you have said is sincerely appreciated.