Beneath the Tundra

The snow and ice are almost completely melted.

AT LAST!!!

My rump is thankful.

I went back to workout for the first time since my back started acting up after my front porch step rump-ba, and chose water aerobics. Thankfully, Dina was teaching the class, and she made sure to do a long portion for stretching out our backs. When we did the water jogging bit, I had to hold my right cheek under the water. I'm hoping it looked like I had my hand on my hip, instead of copping a feel on myself! After the class, I felt like a new woman!

Water aerobics is one of my favorite activities.

Fun + Workout = A Very Happy Charlie!

And then I came home and saw the sludge that used to be my yard. There is grayish brownish grass under there, and lots and lots and lots of MUD.

Mud is one of those things I dislike very much. It has the slickery properties of ice, and the stainability of spaghetti sauce. Throw in my illustrious lack of grace... well, let's just say I'm choosing my next steps very carefully.

The snow seemed so peaceful at first, didn't it? As it was falling down, we were filled with sweet thoughts of Christmas and Little House on the Prairie. But as it's bulk started accumulating, it started getting dangerous. People started falling, freezing, wrecking- beautiful as it is- snow can be dangerous.

Are you seeing where I am heading with this?

In the yard of my life, I started making poor decisions. Instead of dealing with emotional hurts and my past, I began eating. At first, it wasn't so bad. But the more the "snow" (aka- fat) piled on, the more difficult it was for me to see what was really hiding in my yard. (For the record, I have unearthed a treasure trove out in my actual yard- a spoon, some cups, an earring, a screwdriver {from when Tim decided to climb Kilimanjaro in his imagination and used it as a mountain climbers pick} that I have been looking for for weeks...) There were hurts in my yard. Weeds that had taken over the tomato plants and daffodils, broken sidewalks of relationships gone sour. All those things were hiding under the snow.

And as the snow has started to melt- I have been left with a muddy messy pile of nonsense that I have to make sense of. Because I'm not letting the snow come back. And that means I've got to take care of the lawn I've got. Make it better. Make it prosperous. Learn how to grow again in this new season of my life.

I will no longer think that food is an appropriate response for my feelings. Sometimes it WILL be my response, but I know now that I must find other ways as well. I need to face my fears instead of running from them. I have to accept that my yard is unlike anyone else's, and embrace it! I have to let enough sunshine fall on the mud I've got so it dries up and new things can be planted.

New plants, veggies and flowers with stunning display.

I'm ready for spring. I want to deal with this haggard lawn and make it beautiful again.

Because no matter what it looks like now, I know that there is LIFE hidden beneath the Tundra.