An Animal on the Prowl

Maybe my horrormoans are raging, but the idea of sexy has been on my mind a lot this week. And since you shrinkites took away some fun ideas about how to incorporate sexy into your life, I thought I might show you firsthand how I am implementing sexy into tonight’s festivities. We are going to a high class Japanese restaurant in our neighboring town of Champaign, to help Tricky Nikki and my brother celebrate their 5th anniversary. Congrats you two. (Jason, don’t knock her up this weekend. Tricky Nikki has been pregnant and/or breastfeeding for the last 4 years. And she's tired of gaining and losing that 30 pounds of baby weight. She looks super hot now, so I know it will be tempting. But resist, dear brother, resist!)

The last time we all went out like this, it was the celebration of their 1st anniversary. We went out to dinner, then hit a few of the old stomping grounds from when Nik and I were both single. And it was a very fun night. We danced, had a few cocktails, and generally recaptured the essence of our youthful selves before the ravages of pregnancy and adulthood stole our misguided thunder. The boys (Matt and my brother, who was home on leave from Iraq) bet Nikki and I that we couldn’t consume numerous amounts of Jello concoctions, and we showed them that we were winners. While I don’t remember much after that, I know that the boys (who were stone cold sober) have had great fun teasing us for the last 4 years about our antics that night. (Including a very wobbly version of the Electric Slide. Hey, it was all the rage in 1996, and the Midwest is 2-5 years behind the trend, which means that in 1998, we were ahead of the curve!)

While tonight I have no intention of getting ripped off my butt like before, I am excited to do a few things tonight. One of those things is trying Japanese cuisine. This will be a first for me, because I am a sturdy Midwestern girl through and through. Meat, potatoes and salad with a roll suit me just fine. While I don’t have a torrid love affair with gravy as some people in my family do, there are some wonderful aspects of midwest simplicity that can’t be beat. So tonight I will be stepping out of my usual comfort zone, and trying something new. I have no clue what to order, but I’ll figure something out.

Next on the list is expanding my style wings. Fashion is extremely important when you are in transition between fat and sexy, especially on a celebratory night like tonight. I found a rocking sale and scored a dress for $7. Yes, $7 people. I was ecstatic! But I didn’t have any shoes to match the dress, so I made some. I had a pair of old taupe heels (with a pointy toe) and some fabric dye. I pained the shoes and gave them a broken in leather look that compliments the dress perfectly.

About the dress…now, you all know that I still have issues with the upper arms. While Lotte Berk seems to be toning them nicely, they are still jiggly. And not tiny. But sometime in the near future I am going to have to embrace this body once and for all. I need to appreciate it and be proud, considering where it came from.

I was watching Dr. Oz this week and he did a special on a mother and daughter who suffered and conquered breast cancer together. He gave them a fashion makeover (courtesy of my favorite stylist Tim Gunn) to help them celebrate their journey. And it got me to thinking…

(this is the part where you all cry in unison, “Uh-oh! Charlie’s been thinking! Look out!)

Do I have an outfit that celebrates how far I have come on my weight loss journey? Something that screams Charlie and embraces all the curves that are almost in the right places? Do I have a dress that makes people look twice when I walk by and shows them a confident woman who has accomplished what she once thought was impossible?

I looked in my closet, and there was no such dress.

So after perusing our sad mall here in Danville, I was left with only a few options. And a tight budget. I found a couple of dresses that might work, and headed into the dressing room. A decision like this can’t be made on a whim. I needed visual confirmation.

The first dress was a little black number that I was really excited to try. As I put in on, though, there was a glitch. It wouldn’t zip around my boobs. And it was too big in the waist. And it looked awful. So back on the hanger it went.

The second choice was a red strappy dress that screamed sexy. However, once it was on, it also screamed “Richard Gere, I’ll show you how to drive a stick shift and give you 88 inches of therapy for the bargain price of $3000!” (If you didn’t get that reference, I am utterly ashamed of you.) After practicing the "jewelry box snap and laugh" in the dressing room mirror, the red “professional dress” went back on the hanger. At which point the dressing room attendant knocked on the door and asked if I was OK. I giggled and said yes, then asked her if she worked on commission. She, very confused, said no. Dang it, I was going to say “Big mistake. Big. Huge!” Back to the dresses.

All I had left in the dressing room was door number 3. And I didn’t like number 3. Everything about it was wrong. On the hanger I thought it would be the hooker dress to beat all. I didn’t like the print, I didn’t like the shape. But it was the right size. So I gave it a whirl. And I was shocked. Completely shocked.

Because it did fit. Perfectly. The print worked on me because of my coloring. And I didn’t look like I was for hire by the hour. In fact, I almost looked classy. Then, I looked at the price tag, and it was $7, which fit even better than the dress itself!

One of the things I love about this dress is how I feel in it. I feel thin. I know that I am not thin yet, but this dress is a step in the right direction. It has cap sleeves, but I don’t feel self conscious about my arms at all. It hugs the waist, which looks little because of the print. And the bodice? Well, my husband is going to enjoy the view tonight.

So, your project over the weekend is to find an outfit that you love. It can be in your closet, it can be new, it can be a friend’s. But you MUST find something to wear that makes you feel good! What is it? Tell me all about it! Where would you wear it? What do you love about it? What does it say about you and your journey to health so far?

Mine apparently says that I have unleashed the beast within. And I love it!!!