Friday, February 12

A fast day in the life of a neurotic theater girl on a diet

I need to make this quick, because it is opening (night) day, and I still have to go to walmart. AGAIN. I was just there yesterday! But last night, my costume kept riding up the back of me from static electricity, and I resembled that episode of Friends with Rachel in the bridesmaid dress! Not pretty. Hence, I must go purchase Static Guard.

I'm going to give you a rundown of my thoughts.

1. My costume doesn't fit. Not like it did 4 weeks ago. Somehow my well intended plans to be on stage in the 150's were thwarted, and I am going to be on stage at 172. ISH. Oh, well. It's not the end of the world. I am attempting to find another 40's inspired dress today that will fit the bill. And the boobs. But I'll still use the afore mentioned static guard, no matter what I wear. Not a good week to have your skivvies showing. Which leads me into....

2. I'm being attacked by Mother Nature. Witch.

3. To be honest, it's been a rough week for me here on the home front. One of the biggest disappointments was that my period was late. And Matt and I- geared up in full faith- thought that I might FINALLY be pregnant! In fact, I was positive of it. But I wasn't pregnant, and the series of events that led me to starting my period wrecked me. It devastated me. Seriously, ya'll, you have no idea what I train wreck I have been this week.

4. We thought we were finally going to get "our house" back. The one I love. The one we had to stop renting when Matt couldn't find a job 3 years ago. The one I have been on my knees in prayer over for the last 3 years since we had to leave. We saw it on sale for 20 grand as it was in foreclosure. If you are friends with me on Facebook, you have watched the drama play out. Long story short? Some turdhead made an offer on it already (4 days after it was on the market) and because of extenuating circumstances we weren't able to secure financing quick enough to get it. I won't get to go home after all. At least, that's the way it looks at the moment.

5. I have learned that Charlie CANNOT fast (for faith reasons about the house, pregnancy, etc.) during the week of a show. I almost passed out Monday night. Worst day I have had in a long time. BUT, in usual Charlie fashion, I found the silver lining for that day. God saved me. Don't really understand from what yet, but I'm pretty sure there's a reason. AND- my big emotional scene in the show "Talley's Folly" was gut wrenchingly wonderful. I was messed up and crazy. And it worked for me on stage. (and we are doing our play to 3 SOLD OUT CROWDS!!! Whoo-hoo!)

6. I am living on nuts and fruit. (And coffee.) Since I cannot fast without crashing as I learned Monday, I am simply eating nuts and strawberries to get me by this week. Kind of a Daniel Fast, for those of you in the Judeo- Christian world. Basically I'm not eating anything that is processed or has flour. (Except for the 3 bites of pizza I had last night. But those don't count.) And I haven't had time to go get a variety of other fruits and veggies, so I have been living on my strawberries. Both fresh and frozen. And pecans and cashews. Honestly, I feel like I am cleansing out my system. My mind is alert, and I am feeling fresh and energetic. The coffee isn't supposed to be on the menu, but I'm leaving it on. It soothes me, and I'm not a big tea drinker. So coffee it is.

7. Matt and I are closer than ever! This play, this week, these broken dreams and disappointments we have... everything we have experienced has led us straight into each other's arms. Matt is so compassionate towards me when I am melting down, and he was a knight in shining armor this week! He wrapped me up in his arms and let me grieve over all my hurts. My sweet darling husband showed me that true love, in the midst of devastation, lets you cry in chest hair and snot and slobber and still thinks you are beautiful. Broken, yes. Beautiful? Absolutely. I'd be lost without him.

Sheesh, this was longer than I thought it would be. Sorry, gang. I guess I have missed you a lot!!!

So, I will update you all again on Monday after the week is over. I'm going to the dentist on Monday morning, so that will more than make up for my lack of blogging lately and my little vacation. Because dentists are more scary to me than rats and dogs. And I might come home with a finger I accidentally bit off. Not my own, of course...

Until Monday- I hope you have a wonderful weekend, and I can't wait to catch up with you then!


trimadsco said...

Awww Charlie, I'm so sorry for all the disappointments & let downs this week. :-( The good news is that God is still with you, he's never left your side this week, and along with your wonderful husband, he will pick you up & move you on! Please post some pics of your show! So wish I lived there, I would totally come see it! But alas, I'm sitting here in GA waiting for our SNOW! Yippee! Anyways, have an AWESOME weekend, and remember that when God's plans aren't the same as OUR plans, it's usually because he has something much more wonderful than we could imagine in store for us!

Autumn Mist said...

Goodness, life is full of ups and downs, isn't it? I sooo hope the show went well, I have been thinking of you. Sorry about the house thing. And I am curious - you've mentioned crying twice recently, both times into your husband's chest hair. When you start crying, does he instantly rip his shirt off or something? I wish I could get my husband to do that!

The Incredible Shrinking Woman said...

HA! That's a good point. Would you believe me if I told you that we fight naked? It's hard to take yourself seriously when your cheeks are on the couch... ;)

Mary @ Giving Up On Perfect said...

Break a leg, Charlie!! I'll be praying!!

Danielle said...

I'm laughing over here just thinking of my husband whipping off his shirt while we are in a fight. I don't know what I'd do!lol

You have been in my thoughts and prayers, girl! I love to watch your walk with the Father. How no matter what happens, even with your discouragements and disappoinments, you still know where to place your trust.

I love that about you! And I love ya!
I'm praying.

Can't wait to hear about the play.

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