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Friday, January 28
How to be a Rockstar when You Feel like a Karaoke Queen...
Some days I can work the socks off my diet. And I feel like a total rockstar. Then there are days I kinda phone it in. It's like pretending I'm Rodeo Drive whilst sporting my JC Penny collection.
Today I'm feeling kinda reflective about my journey. There's lots of BIG NAME bloggers out there who get jagillions of blog hits and inspire masses of people. Me? I'm just a teeny tiny blogger with a heart of gold and a scale addiction.
So when it came to my attention that one of my sweetest and favorite friends is feeling defeated about her diet journey- it made me stop and think.
If I can't touch people in my REAL LIFE, how can I expect to reach others?
So I'm fixing that today.
To my dear friend who is stuck in a slump with the diet-
(I'm not gonna say your name but you know who you are)
I have watched you go back and forth on the diet for almost a year and a half now. You have experienced major ups and downs emotionally, an injury that really set you back, and now I am seeing that you are kinda giving up.
Honey- I understand. 100%. I've been there too.
And I wouldn't be worried about it, except that we have had this discussion lots of times. I know you want this. For you. For your family. For your life.
I see you kicking yourself over and over again because of the weight you have "put back on." Like that makes you a failure or something. But it doesn't make you a failure anymore than wearing foil on your head makes you an alien!!! You aren't failing at all. You are just being challenged!!!
I'm the first to admit it's incredibly frustrating. Cause I know. I've been stuck on plateau after plateau. I've lost and gained the same 10 pounds too many times to count. Does that mean I've failed?
Do I feel like a failure sometimes when I think about it?
OF COURSE I DO!!!
Somehow, we have to change our mindset. If we go into this whole business of losing weight thinking "I CAN do it!" then we set ourselves up for failure. If we say "I'll NEVER do it!" then we don't really start running with the option to lose weight at all.
What we have to say is "I WILL TRY MY BEST TO DO THIS. NO MATTER WHAT."
When we say that we will try no matter what, that gives us freedom to explore our choices. To have good days that bolstier our confidence. To have bad days without beating ourselves up so much we give up.
We can think of every single excuse in the world to NOT do it. That's why dieting is a trillion dollar business. They bank on the fact people are going to give up on themselves long before they lose weight, and they become official Yo-Yo dieters, bouncing from one program to the next, dropping money instead of pounds.
But you? YOU???
You are better than that. You are a wonderful person who has turned your life around. I've seen it. You've become a wonderful woman who loves deeply. Who cares for others beyond their wildest dreams. You showed up at my door and loved me exactly as I was.
And it's about time I returned the favor.
My sweet friend- you have every reason in the world to NOT focus on your health. I know that. But because I know exactly what you are capable of, I don't want you to give up. I know if you set your mind to it, you can do amazing things. You can get your body into better shape. You can make yourself more mobile and strong. You can make the outside match that INSANELY FANTASTIC PERSON YOU ARE on the inside. I'm not calling you out on this because you need to change. I'm calling you out on it because there's no reason in the world you couldn't change.
I love you dearly and completely. Just as you are. And even if you say "Charlie, I'm finished." then I'd still want to have lunch with you. And call you. And maybe even take walks when the weather warms up. Because you are important to me.
But I want to make sure you know that even if you don't believe in yourself right now-
I have faith in you.
I'm begging you--- don't give up on yourself.
I know we started off as Karaoke Queens back in the day. We partied and goofed off and made lots of memories we probably won't ever repeat unless we are alone or with folks we trust.
But now- right here- today- we have the chance to be Rockstars. To be really awesome and help others believe in their dreams. You helped me when I was struggling because you never gave up. You were a good example when I was sneaking oreos. You made me feel like a winner before I ever was one. Well, guess what?
YOU ARE A WINNER TOO. No matter what you think, I know you are!
So please, brush yourself off, don't listen to the negative voices you hear, and just TRY. Just start taking those baby steps again. Putting one foot in front of the other. Slowly, thoughtfully- you know how it works. I'm gonna say it again.
I BELIEVE IN YOU.
I HAVE FAITH IN YOU.
YOU ARE A WINNER.
I'M NOT GIVING UP ON YOU BECAUSE YOUDIDN'TGIVEUPONME.
Much much much much much love-
Charlie (who's hopefully still gonna be your friend after this)