Shiner On!!!

Today.

Bootcamp.

HOLY CRAP.

If I told you it was hard, I’m not sure you’d believe me. Because lots of people whine about how tough things are when it hurts. I know because I am one of those people. Whining is important to finding success. But today, this post isn’t about whining.

It’s about accomplishing incredible things. And what happens when you push yourself. I mean really really push yourself.

So I show up at bootcamp like a good little dieter. 8:45am. My buddy Alyson was there, and thank heavens for that. She makes me laugh my head off. Our fearless leader, Abby was in full force today- totally ready to whip us into shape. If she weren’t so stinking sweet, I’d almost like to hate her. But it’s impossible. She’s tough on us because we need tough love.

Tough sweaty love.

We get started on the workout, laps back and forth. Skipping from one side of the gym to another. Running with knees high. Running while kicking our own butts. Lunging down. Crawling back. It was 9:05 and I was already exhausted.

Then walked in my longtime friend Brandy. She and I go way back. The first time we met each other, we wound up in a loogie hocking contest in the parking lot behind a church. I think she and I are the classiest dames I know.

(FYI- she beat the pants of me in that contest!)

Brandy has this great way of being sweet and tough at the same time. And just knowing she was there made me work harder. I was pushing myself to the outer limits of what I am physically capable of doing on one cup of coffee.

My body was screaming, but my mind kept moving it forward.

Then we came to the steps. Running up and down steps. This has been my fear for a few weeks now, because I am terrified of falling down. If I would break an ankle, I’m not sure what I would do or what would happen to the diet while casted. So I usually plug along slow and thoughtfully on steps. Except that while running steps, you have to move fast or others get annoyed. (Well, I’d assume they would. It would bug me if I was in a rush!) I did my absolute best to go quickly but safely. Up and down for 5 minutes. Then we got a drink and did it for another 5 minutes.

And my body kept screaming. But my mind kept moving it forward.

Finally we got to the “Abby Abs” portion of the day.

I am going to say this with all the love in my heart. NOBODY EVER IN THE WORLD WILL WORK YOUR ABS HARDER THAN MY ABBY. It’s just not possible. I’ve done lots of classes with lots of teachers, and no one else can hurt me like her. And I’m not complaining- this is a very good thing! I’ve started noticing that my belly is changing drastically, and I’m in full support of that.

So much in support, in fact, that I was DETERMINED to be the hardest working cruncher in the whole gym. Working harder than all the thinnys which include Brandy and Alyson. (I’m competitive like that!)

And we began the Abby Abs.

Crunches. 4 sets of 8.

Circle crunches. 4 sets of 8. EACH SIDE.

Bicycle crunches. 4 sets of 8.

Jack knife crunches. I wasn’t even counting anymore.

Abby yells “YES YOU CAN! BREATHE!”

I was breathing so heavy I could hardly hear her. My abs felt like I was wearing a newborn size one piece bodysuit. It was so tight I could hardly move. So I grunted. And I pushed. I strained. And YES I COULD!!!

Reverse crunches. Oh my stars, I was losing steam.

Abby hollered across the gym “I KNOW YOU CAN DO THIS!”

Pretty sure she was talking to me.

Reverse crunches with picking your shoulders off the mat.

Oy VAY this hurt! And by this point, I had tears streaming down my face. Because it was painful. But nobody in that room needed those crunches more than me. They were tears of pain, but my mind was racing with delight! I WAS STILL DOING IT! EVEN THROUGH THE AGONY!!!!

Finally they were on the last set of full on situps. There was no way under heaven or anywhere else that I was going to pull those off. So I double timed regular crunches.

And finally, we got to stretch. We had made it through the class.

We stretched our abs, our arms and our legs. That was when a miracle happened.

“Alyson!!!” I screamy whispered, “LOOK! I’m touching my OWN toes!”

Of course, no one realizes that I have not been able to touch my own toes since high school. It wasn’t a big deal to the thinnys in the class. But Alyson knew. And Brandy understood.

What I didn’t anticipate was that we would get the giggles about it. And after having our abs Abbyfied, laughing made me see stars. But I laughed anyway. Because I had made it to the end of the class, and gave it 125%.

As we were walking out of the class, Brandy and I were chit chatting, and she said “What’s wrong with your face?”

“I’m hot and sweaty.”

“No, above your eyes it’s bruised. Kinda. Did you get smacked in the face?”

“NO! I didn’t! Alyson, you have seen my face after bootcamp. Does my face look weird?”

(God bless Alyson for not walking through THAT open door!)

“No,” she said. “You just look red like normal!”

So we all stood around talking for a few minutes, and eventually walked out to our cars. When I got in the crappy van, I looked in the rear view mirror.

Hmmmm…. My eyebrows did look like they were swelling a bit. And a little on the lavender side.

I drove out to Dollar Tree to purchase my “Snowmageddon” supplies that I still needed (we are supposed to get 1 or 2 feet over the next couple days) and checked my face before I walked into the store. It was a little more lilac.

Alyson ended up shopping there too, and we had a BLAST getting our batteries and flashlights together. And everytime I laughed, my face hurt. I warned her not to go into the aisle with the greeting cards (cause I sneaky farted right before I saw her), and went into the bathroom at the store to check the face damage.

Yep, little more eggplant than before.

Nuts.

So the lesson of the day is this:

If you give it your all, you can be a shiner star of your class!!!!

SO SHINER ON!!!!!!!!